Parent Support

A parent recently asked me what they could do to support their student in middle school. It is a question that I am asked on a daily basis. The middle years are difficult sometimes because as children turn into teenagers, their focus shifts from "wanting to please mom and dad" to "wanting to fit in and please their friends." Teens become more social and more aware of their peers and how they "fit in" the social network of school. As I ponder how parents can best support their child, then the best answer I can give is to use every opportunity as a teachable moment. It is so easy for us as parents to want our children to excel at everything, be the best, have a lot of friends, and always make the right decision. However, the reality is that there is always going to be someone better, smarter, or more popular. Kids are kids--they make mistakes. We have to teach them how to learn from those mistakes, and the first lesson is a lesson in personal responsibility. Students have to learn how to make good choices, and if we don't hold them accountable for the wrong choices, then how do we get them to see what the right choice is? It is so much easier to move past the teachable moments by blaming some other kid, blowing it off as "not that big of a deal," or simply ignoring it. Being a parent isn't easy, but we have to be parents. We can not simply sit by and allow society or the school to raise our children for us. So, my advice to parents on how best to support their child---hold your student accountable for all of their choices--good or bad. Celebrate when they make the right choice, and hold them accountable when they make the wrong choice and remember that a little bit of patience goes a long way! :o)